I’m getting ready to pound the final nail in the house of My 39 Things. Is it six months past deadline? Yes. Does anyone other than me really care that I missed this arbitrary deadline? No. Ok, there are a couple of you who are kinda be dicks about it…but I know you’re only trying to keep me motivated.
I set out on this project as a way to hold myself accountable to a consistent writing practice. As with most creative ventures, my consistency ebbed and flowed.
I didn’t forget about you. I know I’ve got like five more things to write. I’m struggling with my creativity right now. Things have been hard and I’m challenged by how to write from an authentic place. And while I know it can be powerful to write from a place of vulnerability and candor, I’m not there yet.
Earlier this year, my creativity was at an all-time high. Ideas came faster than I knew how to manage them. And now I struggle to connect with that piece of myself. To put it mildly, it’s bumming me out.
I shared this frustration with one of my besties and he described creativity as a “calorie in/calorie out” situation. It resonated. I’m not in a space where I have enough creative calories coming in to produce any output. My body is trying to be smart about where to send my calories and I’m running a deficit. I’m losing creative weight. My creative spark is still there, but it looks more like a weak flicker on a breezy day. … Read the rest
I live in fear of my life becoming too simple. Uninspired. Average. A sugar cookie life with cookie cutter constraints. I’ve fought relentlessly against this kind of life, surrounding myself with people and hobbies that reveal secret passageways into my creativity. I’ve prioritized it because it’s always been my sure-fire ticket to happiness.
For the past few months I’ve been feeling very cookie cutter. Uninspired. Average. Demands are high. My favorite people and hobbies have been far away, and I haven’t allowed myself the time or space to seek new ones. This is why you haven’t heard from me in awhile. Each time I’ve tried to write, it seems silly and I quit. My creative spark is barely flickering.
Recently on my way to work, I stopped by McLain’s Bakery in the Waldo neighborhood of KC. This is a gorgeous, spacious bakery with lots of seating and way too many choices. In the morning, the pastry case is steamy and chock-full of pillowy danishes, rolls and croissants. They also have a case of cookies, and … Read the rest